I was young when my assault occurred and the first person I shared with was a family member. They didn’t believe me.

It was so hard to live through and I had to do it alone. I want everyone to be heard, believed and not judged. This is not what defines us. Together we are all stronger. I am here to be part of that strength.

I thought sexual assault was such a rare occurrence. I thought that I didn’t know anyone who had been sexually assaulted, until someone close to me opened up. We had known each other for many years before she shared with me. The only person she ever told, right after the assault, made her feel shame.

I don't want anyone to be in a situation where they are alone in something so hard.

"I was sexually assaulted in my late teens. I knew the person who assaulted me and didn’t feel comfortable telling anyone for many years. I lived with that burden all by myself. I even often saw my attacker after it happened. It was one of the worst times of my life. I want to be there for anyone in need. I want to help this community to provide the support I didn't have"

I worked in the sexual assault unit at a college. Survivors were often not only hesitant to report the assault but they didn’t even feel comfortable telling their parents or close friends. It made me understand how alone so many women and men are in their trauma when they need support the most. They felt they needed to conceal their experience and pain due to fear of judgment, non-belief or blame. I know I need to do more to help.

I was an avid bike rider in my early twenties. The world seemed at peace and my mind could relax as I sped through the beauty. One day a high school girl from my town was raped on that path. I never rode my bike there again. I’ve thought about that girl over the years and each time send a prayer and good thoughts that she’s OK. That’s just not enough. Not What Defines Us is an opportunity to do more.